One of the ironclad rules of Dessicated Coconut (besides "No wearing white before Memorial Day") is: Absolutely no paparazzi articles or photos, whatsoever. The rule is observed out of respect for the privacy of David and his family, and also because I don't agree with the underhanded, stalker-ish methods they use to obtain photos and information. If anyone's going to make stuff up and spread scurrilous rumors on DC, it's me.
Having said that, I'm going to violate that rule just this once, here in the Grove, because I think it's important to address this. There's been a small kerfuffle in Daisy Nation lately, after a German tabloid published an article which claims Kate Agnew and David are a) married and b) pregnant. The text of the article (translated by bellis) runs thusly:
In Lord Of The Rings he rode a horse and in Berlin he lets a limousine drive him around
Actor David Wenham (42, alias Faramir) were together with his pregnant wife Kate Agnew, daughter Eliza Jane (4) and a nanny driven from Hotel Concorde to a playground (somewhere, Tiergarten means Zoo) on Thursday.
After an hour they continued. The married couple went to the National Gallery and looked at black-and-white photos by Japanese Hiroshi Sugimoto (59). Afterwards they went to a designshop in Auguststrasse.
What is Wenham doing here? A couple of days off and sightseeing before the filming of his newest project starts. He's to be in Sönke Wortmans (48) next flick Die Päpstin (Pope Joan) and will be in front of the camera from next week on.
The film also stars John Goodman (56) Johanna Wokalek (33).
****
Personally, I think it's always prudent to consider the source before jumping to conclusions. BZ Berlin, from what I've been told, is a German tabloid, along the lines of the Sun or the National Enquirer, which has a somewhat carefree approach to the truth. The reporter who wrote the article obviously didn't speak to the family, just surreptitiously followed them around on what was supposed to be a private day off. If Kate really is pregnant, I doubt they would break the news to a random papparazzo from a German tabloid, particularly if it was early in the pregnancy. Generally, cautious people, and especially celebrities, don't publically confirm a pregnancy until they're well into the second or even third trimester. (Unless you're the Duggars, and you announce it on the Today show even before the second line shows up on the pee stick).
As for the married part, Kate has been referred to as David's wife a few times before, mostly as the result of reporters making inferences and assumptions from what they've observed. It's part of their job to sculpt a lively narrative about their subjects, but sometimes it leads to inaccuracies. So, I would caution everyone not to accept any of this as gospel until there's corroboration from a more reputable source.
On a different topic, I saw a bizarre film the other day called The Norman Rockwell Code, a spoof of The Da Vinci Code. It had something to do with a cult of lobsters trying to stamp out mermaids. At the beginning of the film, a director is found dead on the floor of the Norman Rockwell museum with a harpoon through his chest, clutching a lemon and a can of tuna fish. The bad guy, who's half lobster and half human, is sort of like Silas, the albino Opus Dei monk from The Da Vinci Code. He flagelletes himself by dipping his claws into a pot of boiling water and going "Ow!....Ow!...Ow!....." Eventually, he's subdued with melted butter, and the police arrive and put giant rubber bands over his claws.
The director and lead actor were at the screening, and they introduced themselves afterwards, to much applause. The lead actor said he was the youngest in a large Catholic family ("It gave me a HUGE ego!" he joked), and got bitten by the drama bug early on.
That reminds me of someone, but I can't quite put my finger on it.... Hm. Oh well. It'll come to me.
