Dessicated Coconut

Triple J Breakfast interview

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Interview with David on an ABC morning radio show called "Triple J Breakfast" to promote The Bank.  Transcribed by make_it_stop.  Sincere apologies for any quotes I garbled.  The DJs, Wil Anderson and Adam Spencer, are referred to as "Host" and "Other Host", since I couldn't tell which was which.

Host: ...Triple J breakfast, Adam and Wil, joined by
Australia's greatest actor and sexiest man in the
world, who I think -- just ratified by the United
Nations, David Wenham.  Congratulations.

DW: Ah, thanks for that.

Host: If you could only be one of the two, which would
you take?

DW: No, easily the former.

Host: Yeah!?

DW: Oh, God, yeah.  You could never live up to the
second tag.  It's hard enough to live up to the first
one if you've had it, but the second one is virtually
impossible, especially with my looks.

Other Host:  I gotta say, though, that you have done
something I never thought was possible.  In the days
when I was in school, red hair was bad luck...

DW: It swings in roundabouts.

Host: Oh, the carrot-top's back.

DW: Oh, I think so.  I think it's back big time.

Host: How long can you -

DW:  David Caruso was big there for awhile.

Other Host: For a couple of weeks!

Host: As a former debater, you're struggling for
material when you lead with David Caruso. (Laughter)

Other Host: You're pretty modest about it, but also - I
think the thing that would bother me, if I was you, is
- my mum, and a whole bunch of her friends -- very big
fans of your work.  You could deal with some of your
mid-20 groupies.... but my mum in a pack with, y'know,
some streusel slices?

DW: Yeah...yeah, that's my fan base.  I'd say mid-50s
to the 80s.

Host: Yeah?

DW: My fan base.

Host: Is that a whole lot of women projecting
themselves into Sigrid's character and going "well,
he's made her happy, tell you what,  I could do with a
Diver Dan around the house"?

DW: (laughter) Possibly "a Diver Dan around the

Host: Well, as you know, David, I'm a bit of a maths
geek myself and I'm very excited to see one of the
sexiest men in Australian film mathing it up in this
latest one.  Did you wrestle with the beauty of
numbers, warming up for the role?

DW: Well, you had a lot of guys researching the
mathematics, so it did seem pretty realistic, and
quite believable.  But in terms of trying to
comprehend the actual mathematics itself - no, that's
beyond my comprehension.

Host: So if youre a good enough actor, you can pull
off a role like you've done, even if you were - not
saying you were - but I mean, in complete ignorance of
the subject matter?

DW: I think you've got to understand a little bit of
it.  Acting, you know, it's basically "lets
pretend".  So I was playing a "let's pretend"
mathematician. (Laughter)  I'm making it sound very
juvenile, the craft that I'm involved in.

Other Host: Yeah, the winner of the 'Best Pretender' at the
Oscars this year...

DW: (laughter) Well, I could tell you, wouldn't it
have been very easy, at those particular awards...

Host: Can I ask you about...there's a push for reality
TV at the moment.  Celebrity Survivor, celebrity
Big Brother.  Let's just say there was a celebrity Big
, you've got David Wenham in.  Which character
would you go for: the nerdy maths genius from The
?  Diver Dan?

DW: I don't know if you'd win it, but what might make
fascinating viewing is Doug from Cosi, who was a
pyromaniac. (Laughter) I think that would be
fascinating viewing.

Other Host: I don't know if the other housemates would like
you, but nobody in the audience would ever vote you
out.  (Laughter)

DW: (plottingly) Ye-e-es.

Host: See how much you do that bum dance when you're
on fire?
Other Host:  Just patting, trying to put yourself out.

DW:  That's right, the flaming bum dance.

Host:  David Wenham, thank you for your time.

DW: Absolute pleasure.

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