Baseball Miscegenation
Mood:  incredulous

While strolling in the park recently, one balmy golden eve, I came upon a twentysomething couple holding hands.  Ah, young love, thought I, smiling indulgently.  Then they came closer, and my heart froze in horror.  He was wearing a Yankees hat.  She was wearing a Red Sox hat.

Oh, fie!  Vile, vile, filthy abomination!!  Worse than Hatfields and McCoys.  Worse than Capulets and Montagues.  A love wrong on so many levels.  What if those two got married and had kids?  Mutated, confused kids, who chant "1918!" while getting all weepy over "Sweet Caroline", whose only role models are Roger Clemens and Johnny Damon?  It doesn't bear thinking about.

The Federal Defense of Baseball Act states: Marriage is between one Red Sox fan and one Red Sox fan.  Or one Yankee fan and one Yankee fan.  Period.  I can't even look at this photograph without flinching.  Those pinstripes are...touching...his strike zone..... 

 

This prohibition applies across the board, by the way.  Cleveland fans may only marry within the American League West.  Mets and Braves gametes must not mingle...well, you get the idea.  Exception:  Cubs fans may intermarry freely.  They're like the universal blood donors of baseball fans.  Everyone loves the Cubbies.

Speaking of things Chicagoesque, the consensus on Public Enemies seems to be that you should not go see it solely for David, as he is not onscreen a great deal and doesn't have much of a speaking role. (Although he is the first character seen in the film.)  However, you should definitely see it if you like Johnny Depp or Christian Bale or have an interest in that period of history; and of course the big-screen theater experience can't be duplicated at home.  (Well, not at Casa DC, anyway; I don't know about your home setup....)

I think I'm probably going to wait for the DVD, mostly because free time is in short supply this month.  Review to follow later.