Dessicated Coconut

sh_wulff's review of cyrano

DATELINE:  Wednesday, April 6, 2005
sh_wulff, our intrepid "embedded journalist" stationed in Oz, reports on her recent road-trop to see "Cyrano de Bergerac"  (sorry, that's road a little excited there).   You can pull up a whole chair to read it, but you're only gonna need the edge..........
halfway to a festival I realize I had left my ticket to Cyrano in Sydney Shocked

do I turn back?
do I try to finagle an entry ohne tickets?

I had lost my wallet

all my creditcards were new.. how could I prove I am who I am??

leave the stress and go to festival Cool
drumming (bigV eat your heart out) Wink

comes the morning of the 28th

packing belongings again for road-trip

lose travelling companion

leave 90 minutes too late

can do 270km in 4 hours

no worries
time for a shower a shave and a sprice up

burning up the highway

trusty grenn car flying

its jewel colour shining in the early autumn sun

Melbourne Playhose here I come......


come to a large parking lot known as the M31 Freeway

free with exhaust fumes yeah

moving at a snails pace

frantically look at map

can I make it using byroads and sneaky secret ways??....

down though some beautiful mountain gorges ( less than 30km out of melbourne)aan lush temperate rainforest

curves as dangerous as Jessica Rabbits

ooopsies travel companion has motion sickness

pull over

ckean up the car

the sun is beginning its journey to the golden peach hues of sunset

5pm.. still 40 kms away from dropping off travel companion and show starts at 6pm


yeah I know

continue my way
hit another Freeway moving with the traffic

arrive 545pm


decide to not even try to make show

have bath, restore Yahoo Serious style hair to some semblance of sleekness

Crying or Very sad

wonder if I can get to see the show at all

next day ring BoxOffice

53 minutes ON HOLD Mad Very Angry Lightning Angry Lightning Very Angry Mad

hang up

theatre tells me to ring box office again

I question whetehr I'm a true Fazgul or nooooot???

what would PFaz the doyenne of Fazgulls do??

or FRuby with her fledgling Fazgul wings????

Well I showed my true Fazgul colours that day

went back on the telephone with grim determination as there were only four more shows left

yup my Fazgul heart showed it's true colours

no Black Breath of impending failure was going to faze my Fazzy and DW obssessed heart

no! no! no!

no computer generated Saurons were going to keep me from my goal

a mere ten minutes later
I hear a human voice:

<< only one ticket??>>>

<< which day??>>

<<let's see>>


Shocked Shocked Shocked Shocked

you could have bowled me over with a feather Clapping Happy Happy Dance Clapping Happy

well with as much aplomb as I could muster I managed to say:

<< err...umm I guee they will do OK>>

although I really wanted to


ahh the advantages of giving good phone Whistling

so the date was set

oh the anticipation of having to wait an extra 36 hours
I tell you it was hard

such a long time

the morning arrives

comb and blowdry my hair( people who know me know this is anathema.. usually Laughing )

thwn... NOOO!!!!!!

wardrobe crisis Woah!

what to wear...

decide on red to reflect his gingery goodness

take the train in

train is delayed Bangs Head

visions of missing the show again fill my mind Sad

run in my lovely high heel boots

and make it just as the last call is sounded


sit down
my heart racing at the speed of light

my mouth dry my palms sweaty

the auditorium darkens
the cuttain opens and it begins..
a play within a play
a Farce

but where is Cyrano

from the back right I hear his deep booming voice

a thrill runs up my spine

he make his way down slowly
the hair on the back of my neck is erect with excitement
because he is coming down on my side of the seating

he leaps onto the stage.. his presence outshining the others ( not that I'm a biased fangrrl or nuthin' Wink... just sayin' )

he struts on 2 inch heels with the grace of a leopard
he swash buckles
his skill with a rapier is as sharp as Cyrano's wit

in real life his eyes go from stormy grey blue to bright blue with emotion
sweat flies
as sometime does a little spit

I've being the recipient of some real DW body fluids Shocked Shocked Shocked (because sometines he is less than three feet away)

oh and I ain't sharing

nyah nyah nyah

he's a force to reckon with through almost three hours of the play


Heart Fazgul heaven Heart

sadly you girls have no time to make it down here because it was certainly worth seeing.. at least once

the girl who sat next to me had been FIVE times ( no I'm not green with envy The Eye .. really really I'm not Puke .. well at least if I repeat it often enough I'll BELIEVE... must try to get ZEN calmness Cave Troll )

the Play itself was "stagey" yet that added to the pathos of Cyarno's situation
I laughed, I cried ( though would not do to smudge my mascara Rolling Eyes )

Cyrano was dressed scruffilly Thumb's Up
with his shirt half undone Love Smiley
one could peek at the tendrils of golden and ginger chest hair sometimes glistening with sweat Heart
his lip sometimes wibbled

oh and he did his dying scene RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME

just for me too ( OK that is a fantasy.. my inner 3 year old claimed it was just for her.. so who amI to disbelieve)

I could even pretend to be his Roxane comforting as he dies

well I really did blow my Fazgul brain Love Smiley Lightning Love Smiley if you get my drift

during the interval I ask staff where I am most likely to get that treasure of treasures..his autograph Heart Heart Heart

get advised to wait at the front door

<<< wulffie fantasie

he appears with his blue paisley shirt half undone
his leathe jacket on top and
some well fitting jeans

he says he loooves dessicated coconut
and would love to do an interview exclusive>>>

I wait at the theatre main entrance...

to be continued...


doncha lurv cliff-hangers

is wulffie waiting in the right place??
will she meet him??

will she get an autograph

wait until the next exciting installment

Cyrano Review
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