Dessicated Coconut


David Wenham as Josh

"Hello?  Is Hugh Jackman there?...No?  How about Hugh Jass?....Hello? ....Hello?"

Stupid Gondor Jokes  How many Stewards does it take to change a light bulb?

Warning Labels of Middle Earth


Australian Red Whines  make_it_stop reviews some of the more popular vintages.

Jar-Jaromir, Faramir and Boromir's long-lost half-brother.

The Rehab Clinic.  Worried that your Wenham addiction might be getting out of hand?  Check into one of our medically supervised treatment programs.

A Child's Garden of Faramir Verse.  Haiku, low-ku, and miscellaneous rhyming swoons posted at TORC and ADW.

Find Your Faramir by rohandove. Quiet!Faramir, Eowyn!Faramir, Naughty!Faramir....there's one for everybody.

The "Gondorsal Fin".  Ever wonder what Faramir's hair looked like after wearing that pointy, Hershey's Kiss-shaped helmet all day?  Lady Wenham (formerly of TORC) provides the answer here.

The Osgiliath Dictionary  A not-so-serious glossary of Tolkien book/movie terms.  Are you an Arwenham?  Is your husband a Faramirage?  Why is your neck all covered with Riddermarks?

"Lord of the Swoons", a parody written by posters on the Tolkien Online message board (TORC). 
A fellowship of Faramir fans struggle to combat the dark power of Sean Bean, who has seduced one of their own.  Along the way they are plagued by the keening shrieks of Legolas groupies who wantt 2 hav 0rliz babeeeeez!!!!!11111
Part Three  The tearjerking conclusion!

Action Figures  It all started with a little girl's letter to Santa....

Gondor Needs No Pants  A field guide to jungle fauna.  Mature audiences only.  (Ed. note:  The word "mature" should be qualified by giant, ironic finger-quotes.)


The Dom-Land Caribou  Tolkien and ice hockey:  together at last. Quite possibly one of the strangest websites ever.
In March 2004, Captain Faramir led the Ithilien Rangers to a 2-0 shutout over the 'Bou, scoring both goals on a power play.  Boromir, the burly center for the Caribous, was "unusually subdued" after the game.  Read the game summary here

In 2004, the captain of the Ithilien Rangers was voted onto the very first all-star MEHA team, and honored with his own trading card.

Fazneyland, "The Hunkiest Place On Earth".  PrincessFaz's vision of a brand-new Epcot Center realm.

Extra! Extra!  Faramir appears on a cinnamon bun in Hibbing, Minnesota!  Make_it_stop reports on The Farabun Story

Faramir and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day  by make_it_stop.  Having a bad day?  Maybe this'll cheer you up.

Character Chart plotting the position of each of David's movie characters in a two-dimensional moral universe.  This is one of the most gratifyingly absurd things I've ever seen.

r0tfL sa1d d3n3th0R as h3 l1t teh pyr3. 1 am teh best dad evah! w00t w00t! g0nd0RR pwns!!!1 m0rd0r sux0Rzz!11111oneone
The Simpsons  David and Faramir get the Matt Groening/ make_it_stop treatment.  Ay caramba!
Top Ten Worst 'Houses of Healing' Pickup Lines  And yet he still got the girl.

Ricolaaaaa!   I don't know who did this, but it makes me laugh.  Alpenhorn sound effects not included.

Faramir Pancake Head Week


Special Gondorian edition of the Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
Cinderella?'s Gingerfella!  A Tolkienish play in four parts, brought to you by those crazy gals at TORC.

A long time ago, in an eored far, far awayFaraWars, the LOTR/Star Wars/Moulin Rouge/Whatever Crossover Page.  (On second thought, don't go there...'tis a silly place.)

What's your sign?  Venus is in the seventh house of Diver Dan, and Murray Whelan is rising....come check out your Dessicated Coconut Daily Horoscope!
David's Alter Egos:  If David Wenham were a pirate, or a hobbit, or a Rastafarian (or a Rastafarian hobbit pirate), what would his name be?  Find out here.
How did Carl achieve his unique hairdo? With a "carling iron", of course. Going to Oz-giliath: Special David Section
As part of Dessicated Coconut's worldwide "Cubicle and Home Office Beautification Initiative", we offer this set of full-color, limited-edition Motivational Posters inspired by David movies.
2006 DC Animated Advent Calendar.  Not work-friendly - use headphones or turn down your volume first.  (Troubleshooting and directions here)
300: The Battle of Thermopeeplae   Brave marshmallow bunnies hold off a million grotesque duck-shaped invaders.
Puzzles are supposed to keep your mind sharp, but somehow, these David-themed jigsaw puzzles have the opposite effect.
As a public service, we at DC have created this free Emergency Notice to safeguard your loved ones.  Print, clip, and display in your front door or window:
You've played Monopoly...but have you played Wenopoly?
Neil Fletcher on Twitter  A collection of Neil's snidest tweets.

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